.Poop.

It's only Tuesday and this week stinks already--

literally S T I N K S.

I am choosing my words carefully as I type because the words in my head contain cuss words and rather strong opinions that will most likely hurt someone's feelings..so..here I go, hesitant as I type.

I just need to vent a little, is that alright with you?--

Oh it is, G R A N D! Here I go!

Poop. I hate it. My job as a nanny over the past 2 years has exposed me to more poop, poop that is not my own, than I ever imagined possible. As a parent, I understand this becomes a daily "duty" and you probably get used to the smells, textures, and colors (maybe?).. Welp, I am not a parent which means all of the poop I am discussing, the poop that is not my own, is also not my childrens' poop--it's someone else's kids' poop. Because of this simple fact, I am and think I will always be, grossed out by POOP..(even when the time comes for my own children--ugh to poop!)

I began my nanny job when the girls were 13 months and 2.5 years old. This meant everyone was in diapers and the food being consumed by the girls was very similar to your average adult which can only conclude one thing about their poop: It was massive--explosive adult-like POOP!

I quickly made a new best: soap. Oh, how I love hand soap and all of their sweet aromas.

Other peoples' poop was now a part of my everyday life. Living the dream?--(Hmm, now that's one to ponder.) Honestly, I have loved my job and have truly been captivated by the little ones I watch and thank the Lord daily for giving me this opportunity to learn and grow as a "parent in training." I feel extremely fortunate for this on going experience because it has taught me a lot about myself and what type of caregiver/mother I will become.

That said, let me still emphasize how much I despise poop. I have been along for the ride through Grace's potty training and it was bad--all I am going to say on that matter. Now Joy is 3 and seems to be following her big sister's path regarding putting poop in the potty. There is never a "whoops--I had a pee accident"--nope, it always goes a little something like this..

Me-"Girls, what is that smell?"
Grace- "Not me!"
Joy- "Maybe it was Colden." (my dog)
Me- "Joy, did you poop in your pants?"
Joy- "No, I did not. Grace did you?"
Grace- "No, look!" (as she pulls her pants down and "bares" all)
Me- "Joy, come with me to the bathroom please."

...

Every time she poops, she lies to me about it. I do my best at attempting to understand the thoughts of a 3 year old.."maybe she is embarrassed..maybe it really did slip out and even surprised her"..but then I think.."she knows she did it..i mean, she had to literally push it out and let's face it--it S T I N K S, everyone can smell it!" I pray daily for wisdom and guidance at how I speak to her, the tone of my voice, and the actions I take.

Today, I got angry..sad but true.

Angry that her teachers did not change her (trust me, the smell was like walking into a wall)--angry Joy did not speak up and tell her teachers she had to go potty and angry she did not tell them she went potty in her pants.  I realized she had pooped the second she stepped into my car from the car pool line. I realized she may have felt embarrassed around the other children so I drove my car around to the back corner of the parking lot and backed in so I could change her in the back without anyone seeing, even noticing us. Well--this poop accident was too much for me to handle. The poop spilled out of her pull up onto her thighs and back. I frantically used the baby wipes to prevent poop from getting on her dress and in my car (the one my husband just had cleaned) but failed miserably.

It was already on her dress and on the car mat.

The smell was enough to kill ya--I stuck my shirt over my nose and breathed through my mouth convincing myself this technique works. I felt like every time I wiped, I was only spreading the thick, play dough like, green poop on her little body more and more. It was awful. After a few minutes of gagging and wiping, her skin tone returned and the green was no more.

The drive home was nothing but a cruel mental game with myself. My hands were not washed (since we were in the parking lot) and even though I used hand sanitizer, my mind was visualizing the little green poop germs spreading from my hands..to my wrists..to my arms..it was terrible. The stench was trapped in my nose hairs and tortured my stomach the entire ride home.

I hate poop.

When we got home, I changed Joy's outfit, wiped her bottom/back/thighs with a warm rag and put a new, fresh pull up on her and tucked her into naptime.

And now, here I sit, still smelling the poop and still imagining it on my hands even after washing and scrubbing my skin dry.

My day was going really well and then--poop decided to ruin it all. Am I overreacting?--It may seem it to you, especially if you are a parent or teacher of pre-school, but poop simply S T I N K S and puts me in a sour mood. I try not to let it--but it always wins! I had to get out my thoughts and hopefully I did a good job and keeping in the things I needed to in my head.

If not, sorry guys, poop just S T I N K S ! ! !